Willy Wonka Parenting Advice?

Do you remember the old Willy Wonka movie with Gene Wilder?

Do you remember Veruca Salt, the spoiled child who demands whatever she wants and gets it immediately? She says, ’I want the world, I want the whole world… I don’t care how, I want it now. …And if I don’t get the thing I am after, I’m going to scream…’

Then her simpering father would say yes dear, I’ll get that for you right away. (A terrible parenting strategy).

So often, parents act like Veruca Salt, saying, ‘I want this, I want that, I want everything, and I want it all right now.’ And expect our children to calmly say ‘Yes, of course, you will have exactly what you want, right away.’ And, if our children don’t respond like this, we, like Veruca, scream and throw a fit for not getting what we want when we want.

Parents, you are the grownup in this relationship and your children are observing your behavior to learn how they are supposed to act. You need to have the emotional maturity to not act like a spoiled child when things don’t go how you’d like, especially if you don’t want your children to learn and model this same behavior.

Impatience may seem to yield results in the short term, but it can have long-lasting negative repercussions, such as: eroding the trust and respect your children have for you, emotional disconnection, injured relationships, fear of you, perpetual fear of the reactions of others, needless fighting, and more.

Throwing a fit until your demands are met is the not ‘golden ticket’ you might believe it to be. Like the main character Charlie, you will get more of the sweet rewards by showing the people you love that they are more important to you than tasks or things. When your children first know how much you value them, THEN they are more willing to comply.” 

--Quote from CHOOSE HAPPY: BE THIS, NOT THAT