The Secret To Happy Ever After

“Sometimes we like to act like Hollywood directors in our lives. We have an unwritten, unspoken script for others, with our expectations of exactly what those in our life should say, do, and exactly how things are going to go. As the director, when things are not how we want them, we are quick to announce CUT! and jump in and tell them to say it like this, or, do it like this instead. 

While this may be a format that produces better movies, it is not one that produces better relationships or better results.

You can be a director in your own life. Decide what you will do and say and how you will do and say them, but you cannot decide those things for other people. 

People act differently than your “script” because they don’t know about it, and they do not believe that your way is the way to their “happily ever after.” Forcing them to stick to your unwritten script proves to them that your way is the path to unhappiness, and they resist it even more.

In order to improve your relationships, and your peace of mind, you need to throw away the “ideal” script with your “happily ever after” ending that you envisioned for the people you love. They aren’t following the script anyway, so letting it go makes both of you happier, even if they go off-script of how you thought and hoped things would turn out.

Though it seems counterintuitive, tossing out the script is actually the way to produce better results, better relationships, and a better life. The way to “happily ever after” is to let go of your expectation of what “happily ever after” looks like.” 

--Quote from CHOOSE HAPPY: BE THIS, NOT THAT by Jennifer K. Hughes